
Kogiflame
By Maryam Abdulmalik
If you “toast” (as we say in Nigeria) or, in plain English, try to woo a woman and she refuses you, let her be. Not every beautiful woman is wayward. And even if she is a “certified wayward,” she may still choose not to be that way with you. It is her choice, and it must be respected. Don’t ever use your position to blackmail her; else it can boomerangs.
Akpabio’s ego has taken two blows—one private and one public. My brothers, _make una dey hear word._ Premium tears for his supporters. Cry like a river, babies, cry! How one man’s bruised ego can be elevated above the voices of all the citizens who, Senator Natasha represents at the Red Chamber, still baffles me.
I recall an educated and exposed chauvinist once told me that a woman (Natasha) couldn’t stand against a team of men and win. He vowed that she will never be allowed to return. Where is he today to apologize for that crude statement? And why must it always be painted as a ‘fight’? Couldn’t she have been simply expressing her experience? Why do insecure men take pleasure inblackmailing successfull women? She stood her ground, she owned her voice and she won hands down, unapologetically.
More women should speak about how men harass them so that ‘we’ can collectively correct many of the boy children who appear to have been groomed by family, peer influence and society that they could brazenly behave as they are pleased without consequences.
Real men don’t bully women. They support and elevate them. ‘Boys’ must learn. And when I see boys in adult bodies disrespecting women in public, I blame their dysfunctional upbringing by default.
Men and women should lean on each other’s strengths; not competing like rivals. That’s how balance, respect, and harmony thrive. Whether personal or professional, the focus should always be: What’s the purpose of this meeting? What value do I bring? How do we move from point A to point B? These are the questions that matter.
When ego is allowed to override common sense, humiliation follows.
Congratulations, Senator Natasha, the people of Kogi Central, Kogi state and all forward thinking Nigerian men and women.







